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Monday, I went to get an ultra sound. 

Turns out that another lump has formed in one of my breasts. 

It's weird. You know how we tend to take our bodies for granted? 

We forget how sacred they really are. 

I mean, we are who we are by our bodies. God gave these forms to us and said,"This is for you. Take care of it. For some time, you won't believe this, but know that you are perfect in my eyes."

And here I have a couple deformities. 

And that's ok. 

I know God was in that room with me. Comforting me and whispering," I love you. I got this."

The tech said its rare that she's seen 20 year olds develop breast cancer this early. She said it could just be cysts. 

I still have another appointment to attend and from there we'll get more results. 

For now, I'm thankful for a God who is capable. 

Yours truly, 

AGR 

🌜

I like to call this: a classy way to smell your pit. 9.24.14

See you at the Mouse House 🐭

In my home in the Mickey kicks: 9.26.14 

Brother 🐻

Disneyland 9.26.14

Dear...

I wanted to say so long to you.
This isn't a big deal, so don't fret.

I think for awhile now I have been feeling so out of place.
I heard a lot of things.
A lot of things that were being said behind my back.
And that bites, you know?

I wanted to say how disappointed I am in you.
You picked me up so high and when I was low, you weren't there.
This is not a letter to make you feel bad, no.
Well..maybe.
I'm kidding.

It's a letter to let you know that I miss the old you.
I miss the relationship we once had.
I miss how much you cared.
How much you spoke into my life.
I miss how much you loved me.

I don't know why you don't talk to me anymore.
That hurts my feelings.
I don't know why you wouldn't stand up for me?
That killed.
I don't know why you wouldn't think that would hurt my feelings.
That was devastating.

I don't know what to tell you except so long.
It's time to move on.
It is going to be a struggle without you.
I will miss you.
I will miss all our memories.
Our laughs, our cries, the joys, the sorrows, all of it.

You are wonderful, I encourage you to keep haste.
And when you need me, I'll be right over here.

But I can't stay with you. Not right now.
I'm sorry.

Dear Church,

I can't imagine leaving this faith.
But I can't imagine you chasing after me anyways.

Alexis

Can I get a pic? (;

That is probably one of the most degrading sentences I ever receive from guys. 

Now wait a sec, you know what I'm talking about right? Guys that ask for a photo but want a little extra than just a pretty smile. 

In the lieu of meeting new guys from school, other places, etc. I've noticed that after exchanging numbers with a few, they just jump right into this question. I think it's rather horrid. 

Do these guys think I'm pizza? Listen.

You get your pizza. 

Before even digging in, your nose is aroused by the pepperoni aroma it let's off, by the look of that beauty of that square pizza box shows off and you just can't wait to dive in! 

And once you do, you eat to your hearts content. Indulging yourself in every morsel the pizza has to offer. And when you're full and satisfied, all that is left really is the box. And if you're the Earthy type, you recycle it and move onto another pizza or you simply chuck it in the trash. 

And that's how I feel when you ask me for pictures of me: trash. 

Is my hearty insides not worth knowing? 

I mean if I were to send you that, it's like sending everything I am to you through a picture. It's like sex without the physicality of it. 

How dare you try and take that away from me. 

Where is the respect? 

Nowhere.

Cool, you get the trash too buddy. 

Mother with Alzheimer’s Recognizes Her Daughter

I wish I could hear Nona speak like this again.

What a precious experience.

The importance of importance.

In and through this life we lead, we come through times of feeling important.

Being needed.

Being wanted. 

Ultimately having a purpose. 

And sometimes we don't feel this way. 

I remember going through the times of when my church first started becoming my home church. 

Everyone new me. Everyone took the time and effort to seek me out. 

If I wasn't in a service, I would have a text from someone asking where I was. 

3 years later, I don't get those texts anymore. I don't spend the time I once had in that community. And that's heartbreaking.

It's important we feel important. 

And many times we go through life thinking,"Well what the hallibut is the point anymore?" 

I went on a trip this weekend, Labor Day weekend. 

It was lovely. Went and visited California's state Capitol 

Visited Lake Tahoe 

And traveled around Truckee city. Cute stinkin little bitty town.

With houses such as this 

Oh it was such a treasure to get away. 

And during that time, I kind of forgot who I was at home. 

I forgot that despite my feeling of inadequacy, I am important. 

Because this super cool, all powerful God created me! 

This man can move mountains and walks like a hurricane into barriers I can never touch! 

His hands are filled with grace and whenever they are placed over my head, all fear escapes me. 

It's absolutely beautiful the way he works. 

I am humbled that such a being created me. 

I am in awe that he wants me in his plan.

I am amazed when he tells me that whether or not I feel wanted or needed, I am loved. 

I am important. 

You are important. 

The fact of the matter is, the importance of importance is you. 

Have a rad Labor Day, 

Lex